20 Things Different

Hi everybody.

Now that I've been overseas for roughly three months, I thought I'd write a little post about things that I've noticed about New Zealand. If most of them are things that annoy me, well... Let's not go into that.

Right, off we go.

1. They use real sugar, not corn syrup.

2. Coins can actually be used to buy things. Like food. And books.

3. There is no turning right on red. Or more accurately, there is no right-hand-drive equivalent to turning right on red. (Primitives.)

4. You can buy alcohol everywhere. Liquor and lollies are cheap and easy to find.

5. The Weather. I change my clothes six times a day. 'Nuff said.

6. $26.00 a kilo for limes. WTF? I don't want that many limes...

7. There is no such thing as a crosswalk. Or rather, there is ALWAYS such a thing as a crosswalk.

8. The wildlife is oddly loud. And antagonistic.

9. Stupid EFTPOS machines. I spend so much time verifying that I am myself.

10. These people are too energetic for me. I feel like a slug. (I am a slug.)

11. It costs more than God can afford to pay. And that's with a decent exchange rate.

12. My friends are noticeably NOT PRESENT. Three thousand miles, pshh.

13. You can buy beer/wine at the movies. Shocking... (This should go under #4.)

14. Dan Brown is considered good literature.

15. It's called a Cashpoint, not an ATM. I fail.

16. I wear a size 3 shoe.

17. Not enough babies in my life. Except for that one party...

18. I have to convert everything.

19. I am still far away from my boyfriend.

20. Everything needs to be turned on twice. Even my computer.

The Boy Thing

I don't know if this is characteristic of boys, or just my boy, but he doesn't use adjectives.
Really. I am 'pretty.' He is 'doing good.' The weather is 'nice.' For someone who thrives on description it is the one thing I would change about him.

Thus, my never-ending refrain is: ADJECTIVES PLEASE OMG!!!

WolfGrrl

Universal Management

I really wonder if there's an elf somewhere that listens to my complaints and coordinates responses from the Universe. As I was watching TV the other day, I was bombarded by ads informing me that the iPhone is now available from my no-contract cell provider...something I believed would never happen. Needless to say, it brought back my Apple addiction with a vengeance. I am now disgusted with myself.

My Apple addiction is the result of purchasing a Macbook a few months ago, and loving the sleek design and intuitive movements. I dare not praise it too much, as all the men in my life disparage Apple (for the same reasons, hah).

Aside from the Apple Issue, I do legitimately think that this elf listens to my complaints, or at least passes them on to the appropriate department in Management. In the past year, I've noticed that when I finally spend some time bitching (pardon the language, but there's really no other way to describe it) about something, that something is immediately solved, or I am given new information about it.

For example, when I wondered if the Study Abroad office at my overseas university had lost my application, I received an email congratulating me on my acceptance. When I complained that I wouldn't know about my overseas housing until I arrived, I received an email from the director of housing offering me a place. When I feared that my Visa application had been incorrectly filled out, a day later I received the Visa. Doesn't this sound like the intervention of Universal Management to you? I always knew that cursing a computer gets it to boot up faster (at least with Windows it does), but this seems counterintuitive. We are taught as children that hard work and faith, not whining, produce results.

Yeah, that's not what my experience is telling me. So I guess I'm still a child. A very whiny, but highly gratified child.

Mwahahaha.
WolfGrrl

Words with Friends

Not your standard mobile app.

Basically, this is a transcript of a few humorous conversations with a friend. Pseudonyms are used (duh) for privacy reasons. Gasybeans is also on Blogger; her thoughts are awesome, so check her out here --> Thoughts Out Loud

***Some comments have been spliced together. Sorry; I'm a writer. Can't stop embellishing. We do have this conversation a lot though.

Gasybeans: What have you been up to, darling?
WolfGrrl: I changed my clothes a lot this morning.
GB: Hahaha, really?
WG: Truth.
GB: Girl problems.
WG: More like first world problems for girls. Help, I have too many clothes!
GB: Nahhh, you don't. I have more.
WG: *rude face*
GB: Well, it's true.
WG: ...
WG: Good thing we're too cheap to buy stuff at the mall.
GB: Says you! 
WG: Wait, I'm not cheap.
GB: I hope not.
WG: Thanks, dear.
GB: *staggers from sarcasm fumes*
GB: I love you.
WG: *pouts*
WG: Daaaaaa, I can never be annoyed at you. Do you think I should go back for that jacket?
GB: Yes!
WG: That's like asking if I should have more dessert, isn't it?
GB: *huge grin*
WG: Car keys, car keys... We are hopeless shopaholics.
GB: Amen, sister.
WG: Lol
GB: ...
GB: ...
GB: Can you pick me up? I really want that shirt.
WG: Hahahahaha... Yes.
GB: <3
WG: Hopeless
GB: ...and proud of it!

the Sims

I once heard it said that the only people who play the Sims are control freaks, voyeurs, and sadists.
Yeah...
Let's revise that list a bit.

One of the things that my friends and I share is an organizing mentality. We all love the Sims because it allows us to tinker with lives - whether they be our lives (in the game), or just lives in general. Maybe this makes us control freaks. But we all have different styles of playing.

I love to create things. I'm nowhere near my boyfriend's league (he's an architect) and I may build the same basic house design, but I love love LOVE decorating them. I used to drive my sister nuts when we were small and playing Barbies, because I'd spend hours setting up my house only to get bored when we actually began playing.

My boyfriend builds actual houses, but that's what he's learning in school, so I suck up my jealousy and forgive him for being so much more patient than I am. I use the Sims for wish-fulfillment: pets, apartments, prviate mansions, swimming pools...whatever I want. Does that sound control-freakish? (I promise, my Sims lead extremely boring, well-organized lives. The most exciting thing that's ever happened is one of them burned the house down.)

My three best friends at school play the Sims to alternately amuse themselves, torture people they don't like, or satisfy their nesting instincts. We're all so similar it's like HAHAHA Fate.

I love patterns and puzzles; it's why I'm much better at Logic than straight-up mathematics. In the world of the Sims I have the opportunity to design people (down to their clothes) and pets (down to height, weight, fur color) and houses (everything). This makes it a huuuuge time sink, and yet it's absolutely worth the carpal tunnel and eye strain.

Part of the reason I write is to give myself a vacation from reality. Playing the Sims is a bit like taking a mini-vacation: I'm still in a "real-world" (no fairies, dragons, or rocket ships) but I am all-powerful. I get to do whatever the heck I want with these little people and they live and die according to my wishes. *insert evil laugh here*

So... I guess I am a control freak. Awww.
(Although, really, is that news to anyone?)

WolfGrrl

The Horse Ran Away with My Apple

I think this is a case of mixed metaphors, but it makes for a hilarious title, so whatever. Normally one would say "Putting the cart before the horse" or "Upsetting my applecart." Well, what happens when the cart you put before the horse is full of apples? The horse runs away with your apple, of course!

I'm sorry I haven't been that active on here lately; I haven't even got a creative excuse (I went scuba diving with my boyfriend near St. Bart's and was attacked by a whale shark and have been recovering in a Swiss hospital). I have summer school, which I feared would both upset my applecart AND be a case of a cart before a horse, but it actually seems to be going well. Motivation is somewhat lacking, but I blame that on the languid heat of summer and my cat.

To play along with the random theme of mixed metaphors, I think I shall relate a cat story. Once upon a time there was a black witchy cat named Bella, who was obsessed with water. Having chosen a preferred human to harass, she then joined that human in the bathroom every morning in order to leave little brown kitty paw prints all over the (once-clean) tub. Miss Bella would wait, patiently or impatiently, for her human to emerge from the tub before jumping in herself. She also discovered that batting a toy duck around in the tub makes a GREAT noise, and is guaranteed to distract her human and allow her to escape into said human's bedroom.

This cat has not run away with a fiddle; she took my heart in her little black paws, but I was kind of prime for a theft of that sort. "The cat ran away with my heart" is more of a Hallmark card sentiment than a metaphor; she did run away with my St. Patrick's day necklace, and with the $2.00 bouncy ball I received for Christmas. 

My boyfriend has also run off with my heart, but he can't go very far without me (hehe) because I'm almost positive I've got his in return. (Yeah, we're cutesy. Deal with it.) He calls me a kitty, mostly because I am perpetually yawning and I sleep either all over the bed, or in a tiny little ball.

If my cat tries to eat everything I eat, and I am a kitty who adores fruit, maybe my mixed (pureed) metaphor should be "the cat ran away with my apple." I have lots of toy horses from my little-girl phase, but I don't have many cats. I collect toy dogs. I have eight so far, ranging in size from one that fits in the palm of my hand to one bigger than I am. But I digress. I am avoiding my Logic reading.

Oh, that's the call of the black witchy cat.

Ciao, peeps,
Wolfgrrl

The Little Things

I think the best things in life are the little things you don't notice until they go wrong or disappear. The satisfaction I get from cleaning my room, or washing my lunch dishes, or baking a cake that doesn't fall is equal to the satisfaction I get when I finish a semester at school or pass an exam.

I like to wake up and talk to my boyfriend. I like to know that he's smiling just as stupidly as I am. I like to send my friends funny things I find in my daily life, or update them on something random that happened to me in the grocery store. I like finding a jar of Nutella for $4.65. I like seeing the dog stretch, or feel the cat rub her head against my side as she dozes next to me on the sofa.

I like to laugh. I like to watch Pride and Prejudice and clap when Darcy and Lizzie get married. I like to take a nap, and wake up with all of my stuffed animals on top of me or in my arms. I like to watch Lord of the Rings with my mama, or tease my daddy on the phone.

Who isn't satisfied by catching the bus on time, washing your hair, eating a cookie, vacuuming the floor? I washed my car (an event and a half), but it was so pleasant to see it sparkle in the sun. And I got a suntan as well! I like to write a sentence that is so beautifully balanced, it sings like the hills in The Emperor's New Groove. We can learn from Kuzco and Pacha. Simplicity is a wonderful, wonderful thing.

(And so is finding a towel to clean up the spilled water on the kitchen floor, hrmmm)

Cheers!
Wolfgrrl

Friends in Far Places

Hiyah!

Since I'm cheerfully procrastinating about studying for my two ugly finals, I thought I'd write a bit about friends - a subject that makes me giggle, sigh, roll my eyes, and get warm fuzzies in my tummy.

My friends come in all shapes, sizes, walks of life, and locations. But one thing remains consistent: I choose people who make me happy. My selection process is appropriately convoluted (haha - just like this blog!) but it works for me. The people I choose as friends are the people who I'm happy to be with. Seems simple enough, right? My friends, my good friends, are those whom I can run to when I'm having a bad day, or who can make me laugh over Facebook chat. Some of them you know; some of them, you are. They live all over the world, and I talk to them once a day, once a month, or a few times a year. But we have stood the test of time; that's what makes us friends.

Recently, I made a new friend through an online art forum I joined on a whim a year ago. It's rather funny (to me anyway) that the friends I've made through this forum are mostly from Eastern Europe. I knew I had a lot in common with Asians and Asian-Americans, but Eastern Europe is my favorite place to learn about and now I feel justified in my obsession.

Sorry; got sidetracked. So, my new friend is not Eastern European and is actually (shocker) a guy. Hahaha, I can see the open mouths and narrowed eyes as all of you begin to build castles in the air. Don't worry; I did it too. But, ehhhh. Whatever. It's rare that I get along with guys - they're absolutely foreign to me. But it's also rare that I spend three hours talking to anyone...and we've been writing consistently for a few days now. What makes this story interesting is that this guy is actually from New Zealand...the place I shall be studying abroad in, and the place where I'm considering living as an adult.

Coincidence? Who knows? Lately, I've become a big believer in Fate. I choose to believe that choices and events happen when and where they are meant to, regardless of whether or not I think that time and moment are opportune. I can see my mother flipping out, her mind jumping to visions of online perverts and predators. Relax, Mama: it wasn't three messages in that I began creeping internationally, to make sure this person was who he said he was.

Guess what? He was. So now I have a new friend in a far place, and someone to call if I get in trouble in New Zealand. The world is very, very large, but at the same time my world can be shrunk by random chance. Now traveling across the international dateline and to a new country doesn't make me quite so nervous; I have a touchstone. (Sorry to be sappy; it won't last much longer, I promise.)

I like having friends in far places. It makes me feel that I am somewhat bigger than just my hometown. It gives me hope that there is a place where I belong, where I'll feel like the people there are just like me. I have found something like this with my university friends, each of whom shares something with me that I value. (Gasybeans, this is definitely a post you should read: here's your shout-out, my dear!) But it's exciting that I, I who had so much trouble connecting with people for most of my life, am finally able to do so. It feels like my epiphany (that I don't have to live the "standard" life, but rather the life that suits me) is blossoming.

It seems appropriate to end there, given it's spring here, and the world is blossoming. Here's to friends then, and the hope and laughter and hugs that they bring.

This post is for all of you. You know who you are.
WolfGrrl

A (Humorous) List

10 THINGS I CANNOT DO

1. Stand up while laughing. If anyone ever wants to attack me, I have to be sitting down and laughing. Then I'm a goner.
2. That stupid thing where you rub your stomach and pat your head while (this is optional) hopping on one foot. Um, no. Not that coordinated.
3. Drink soda. I get bubbles up my nose, choke and/or sneeze, and spew it all over myself and my surroundings. Not a pretty sight.
4. Eat salad without spilling it all over myself. (See #2)
5. Eat granola without spilling it all over myself. (Also #2)
6. Play any musical instrument with any degree of aptitude. Except, maybe, the kazoo. Or the bongo.
7. Proofs. Oh yeah, if I just tried a little harder...
8. Chemistry. It may not be (all) Greek, but it's Greek to me.
9. Not speak in double entendres. Although I think this reflects more on the dirty minds of my friends than on me.
10. Win an argument with my sister. See #1. And maybe #7. And, oh what the heck, #9 too.

10 THINGS I CAN DO

1. Drive a car. You'd be amazed how many people can't do this [safely]. And I thought New Zealanders had issues...
2. Write a paper. I can write lots of papers, actually. It's a gift.
3. Bake. Eh, not everything, but the nice thing about my friends is that they eat pretty much whatever I bring them. They're like dogs. Or garbage disposals. Only I love them.
4. Talk to children and animals. I'm quite proud of this in fact, though I can't take any real credit since they just find me and attach themselves like leeches. Still, it's rather adorable.
5. Speak four languages. Notice I didn't say I was fluent in four languages. Only that I can speak them. Sort of.
6. Confuse my professors and/or classmates with my philosophical ramblings. Not sure I should be proud of this, but it's so much fun...
7. Avoid jetlag. I think my internal clock migrates. But whatever the reason, I don't usually get jetlagged.
8. Read a book in less than a day (usually three to six hours). This skill has significantly slacked off since college.
9. Organize things. Whether you want me to or not. Mwahahaha.
10. Think of more than 10 things I can't do and less than 10 things I can do. Geez.

This is WolfGrrl.