I swear, there are times in my life where I feel like a yo-yo.
I go from being hostile enough to combust to sitting in tears.
I bounce between grief and laughter. Peace and pain.
Ugh.
However, I seem to be in the peaceful phase right now.
It's a nice place to be.
At peace.
WolfGrrl
Showing posts with label personality. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personality. Show all posts
Friday, September 28, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Friends in Far Places
Hiyah!
Since I'm cheerfully procrastinating about studying for my two ugly finals, I thought I'd write a bit about friends - a subject that makes me giggle, sigh, roll my eyes, and get warm fuzzies in my tummy.
My friends come in all shapes, sizes, walks of life, and locations. But one thing remains consistent: I choose people who make me happy. My selection process is appropriately convoluted (haha - just like this blog!) but it works for me. The people I choose as friends are the people who I'm happy to be with. Seems simple enough, right? My friends, my good friends, are those whom I can run to when I'm having a bad day, or who can make me laugh over Facebook chat. Some of them you know; some of them, you are. They live all over the world, and I talk to them once a day, once a month, or a few times a year. But we have stood the test of time; that's what makes us friends.
Recently, I made a new friend through an online art forum I joined on a whim a year ago. It's rather funny (to me anyway) that the friends I've made through this forum are mostly from Eastern Europe. I knew I had a lot in common with Asians and Asian-Americans, but Eastern Europe is my favorite place to learn about and now I feel justified in my obsession.
Sorry; got sidetracked. So, my new friend is not Eastern European and is actually (shocker) a guy. Hahaha, I can see the open mouths and narrowed eyes as all of you begin to build castles in the air. Don't worry; I did it too. But, ehhhh. Whatever. It's rare that I get along with guys - they're absolutely foreign to me. But it's also rare that I spend three hours talking to anyone...and we've been writing consistently for a few days now. What makes this story interesting is that this guy is actually from New Zealand...the place I shall be studying abroad in, and the place where I'm considering living as an adult.
Coincidence? Who knows? Lately, I've become a big believer in Fate. I choose to believe that choices and events happen when and where they are meant to, regardless of whether or not I think that time and moment are opportune. I can see my mother flipping out, her mind jumping to visions of online perverts and predators. Relax, Mama: it wasn't three messages in that I began creeping internationally, to make sure this person was who he said he was.
Guess what? He was. So now I have a new friend in a far place, and someone to call if I get in trouble in New Zealand. The world is very, very large, but at the same time my world can be shrunk by random chance. Now traveling across the international dateline and to a new country doesn't make me quite so nervous; I have a touchstone. (Sorry to be sappy; it won't last much longer, I promise.)
I like having friends in far places. It makes me feel that I am somewhat bigger than just my hometown. It gives me hope that there is a place where I belong, where I'll feel like the people there are just like me. I have found something like this with my university friends, each of whom shares something with me that I value. (Gasybeans, this is definitely a post you should read: here's your shout-out, my dear!) But it's exciting that I, I who had so much trouble connecting with people for most of my life, am finally able to do so. It feels like my epiphany (that I don't have to live the "standard" life, but rather the life that suits me) is blossoming.
It seems appropriate to end there, given it's spring here, and the world is blossoming. Here's to friends then, and the hope and laughter and hugs that they bring.
This post is for all of you. You know who you are.
WolfGrrl
Since I'm cheerfully procrastinating about studying for my two ugly finals, I thought I'd write a bit about friends - a subject that makes me giggle, sigh, roll my eyes, and get warm fuzzies in my tummy.
My friends come in all shapes, sizes, walks of life, and locations. But one thing remains consistent: I choose people who make me happy. My selection process is appropriately convoluted (haha - just like this blog!) but it works for me. The people I choose as friends are the people who I'm happy to be with. Seems simple enough, right? My friends, my good friends, are those whom I can run to when I'm having a bad day, or who can make me laugh over Facebook chat. Some of them you know; some of them, you are. They live all over the world, and I talk to them once a day, once a month, or a few times a year. But we have stood the test of time; that's what makes us friends.
Recently, I made a new friend through an online art forum I joined on a whim a year ago. It's rather funny (to me anyway) that the friends I've made through this forum are mostly from Eastern Europe. I knew I had a lot in common with Asians and Asian-Americans, but Eastern Europe is my favorite place to learn about and now I feel justified in my obsession.
Sorry; got sidetracked. So, my new friend is not Eastern European and is actually (shocker) a guy. Hahaha, I can see the open mouths and narrowed eyes as all of you begin to build castles in the air. Don't worry; I did it too. But, ehhhh. Whatever. It's rare that I get along with guys - they're absolutely foreign to me. But it's also rare that I spend three hours talking to anyone...and we've been writing consistently for a few days now. What makes this story interesting is that this guy is actually from New Zealand...the place I shall be studying abroad in, and the place where I'm considering living as an adult.
Coincidence? Who knows? Lately, I've become a big believer in Fate. I choose to believe that choices and events happen when and where they are meant to, regardless of whether or not I think that time and moment are opportune. I can see my mother flipping out, her mind jumping to visions of online perverts and predators. Relax, Mama: it wasn't three messages in that I began creeping internationally, to make sure this person was who he said he was.
Guess what? He was. So now I have a new friend in a far place, and someone to call if I get in trouble in New Zealand. The world is very, very large, but at the same time my world can be shrunk by random chance. Now traveling across the international dateline and to a new country doesn't make me quite so nervous; I have a touchstone. (Sorry to be sappy; it won't last much longer, I promise.)
I like having friends in far places. It makes me feel that I am somewhat bigger than just my hometown. It gives me hope that there is a place where I belong, where I'll feel like the people there are just like me. I have found something like this with my university friends, each of whom shares something with me that I value. (Gasybeans, this is definitely a post you should read: here's your shout-out, my dear!) But it's exciting that I, I who had so much trouble connecting with people for most of my life, am finally able to do so. It feels like my epiphany (that I don't have to live the "standard" life, but rather the life that suits me) is blossoming.
It seems appropriate to end there, given it's spring here, and the world is blossoming. Here's to friends then, and the hope and laughter and hugs that they bring.
This post is for all of you. You know who you are.
WolfGrrl
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Daemon
Those of you familiar with Phillip Pullman's His Dark Materials series will get this. For me, this was just so accurate it make me sigh a little - partly wistful and partly resigned.
"You are calm and logical, but not unemotional. You are an introvert, at heart, preferring to read alone than be subjected to the crush and noise of a big party or bar. You have a few friends and family, whose presence you welcome - to a point. Even they can wear on your nerves eventually, and you need to retreat back into your personal space for a while so you can recharge. Your energy comes in bursts, after which you need a long nap or a couple of evenings at home to recuperate.
"You are comfortable with yourself, and reasonably confident. You want the friendship and goodwill of others, but you are not willing to sacrifice your principles in order to get it. If your close friends need something that you can provide, however, you will be the first to offer it.
"You are a good and sympathetic listener, and are aware of your friend's emotional states. With your very close friends, you will open up, but rarely - you don't like to burden people with your problems. At the same time, though, you are honest and are not willing to alter the truth for the sake of convenience. Among strangers you are reserved, and may resort to making jokes to disguise your true feelings.
"While you are not afraid of conflict, you do not seek it, either. When you are hurt or insulted, you feel that you have a choice to make. You can choose to take the up on it and defend yourself, or you can let it pass. Your decision may depend on how well you know the person, how personally you take the insult, or simply what mood you are in that day. Your friends may not always know how you are going to react, for that reason. Whatever you reaction, though, you will be logical, rational and unnervingly accurate: a measured strike.
"Your daemon's form would represent your calm, introverted nature, your cool logic, and your impatience with crowds of people. He or she would probably whisper ironic comments in your ear, give logical advice and try to hide his or her soft side from everyone, even you."
Suggested forms: Peregrine Falcon, Snowy Owl, Snow Leopard, Siberian Tiger, Osprey.
Too true, this.
WolfGrrl
"You are calm and logical, but not unemotional. You are an introvert, at heart, preferring to read alone than be subjected to the crush and noise of a big party or bar. You have a few friends and family, whose presence you welcome - to a point. Even they can wear on your nerves eventually, and you need to retreat back into your personal space for a while so you can recharge. Your energy comes in bursts, after which you need a long nap or a couple of evenings at home to recuperate.
"You are comfortable with yourself, and reasonably confident. You want the friendship and goodwill of others, but you are not willing to sacrifice your principles in order to get it. If your close friends need something that you can provide, however, you will be the first to offer it.
"You are a good and sympathetic listener, and are aware of your friend's emotional states. With your very close friends, you will open up, but rarely - you don't like to burden people with your problems. At the same time, though, you are honest and are not willing to alter the truth for the sake of convenience. Among strangers you are reserved, and may resort to making jokes to disguise your true feelings.
"While you are not afraid of conflict, you do not seek it, either. When you are hurt or insulted, you feel that you have a choice to make. You can choose to take the up on it and defend yourself, or you can let it pass. Your decision may depend on how well you know the person, how personally you take the insult, or simply what mood you are in that day. Your friends may not always know how you are going to react, for that reason. Whatever you reaction, though, you will be logical, rational and unnervingly accurate: a measured strike.
"Your daemon's form would represent your calm, introverted nature, your cool logic, and your impatience with crowds of people. He or she would probably whisper ironic comments in your ear, give logical advice and try to hide his or her soft side from everyone, even you."
Suggested forms: Peregrine Falcon, Snowy Owl, Snow Leopard, Siberian Tiger, Osprey.
Too true, this.
WolfGrrl
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