I am too tired and stressed to write anything original and cute right now; an old post will have to do. Sorry, faithful readers, for my lack of attention to you in the past few weeks. A whole crap-load of stuff has recently fallen on my head, with the end result being I don't really have the time or energy to devote to superfluous things. (Looking at YouTube videos of babies and cute dogs is preventative medicine, thank you very much. It doesn't require the use of my brain.) You know things are bad when I, who believe that unless I am dead or in the hospital I must be in class, considered skipping in favor of a nap.
I am appalled by my own irresponsibility. I have failed myself, even though I went, because that makes two classes today in which I have almost fallen asleep. But whatever; digressions are the product of a sleep-deprived (see the last post) and deranged mind. Instead have a little rant from a few months ago, dealing with one of my favorite soapbox topics of all time: Plagiarism.
Grrrr.
Yes, that's the sound I'm making right now on my computer in the library (sorry to my fellow students, but let's face it, some days you just gotta growl). The reason for the growling and the glaring? Well, if you're not like me and actually do keep up with current events you'll remember that there's been a recent upswing in college campaigns against plagiarism. And for good reason: it sucks to be plagiarized.
Now, thankfully I've never (to my knowledge) been plagiarized, but I have friends who have and everyone is familiar with the idiots scrambling to read off their neighbors' tests or "borrow" their papers. Folks, let's take a minute and think about the consequences of such actions, and I'm not just talking about what the college will do to you if you're caught. Captain Jack had it right when he said that "The deepest circle of Hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers." Substitute "plagiarists" for "mutineers" and you've got a statement that's scary as crap...or should be to all you smug-faced tight-asses who bought your papers over the internet rather than wrote them like all the rest of us. It's people like you who make the world difficult for people like me, and on behalf of suspected plagiarists everywhere I'm letting you know that YOU SUCK.
These days there are so many plagiarists running around that even honest writing comes under suspicion when there's the slightest discrepancy between the quality of the author and the quality of the work. Now, because of my sterling reputation, obvious affinity with language, and the line of people twenty miles long willing to testify that I actually did write that paper, I've never received more than The Glance from a professor. But there are some people who lose scholarships or job interviews or even their careers because they don't have that stockpile of trust to balance the doubts of the Powers That Be. The reason being, of course, those faceless hordes who steal others' work but aren't smart enough to avoid getting caught. I think that people who plagiarize and get themselves busted are a greater menace than the ones who get away. Obviously, it's good to catch and punish such criminals, but on the other hand it gives the Powers That Be a precedent for scrutinizing all future comers with brutal - and not always unbiased - intensity.
Grrrr.
If I were so inclined I could probably spin this post off onto the topic of trust and relationships, but that's a digression for another day. For now I'll just leave you with a little bit of WolfGrrl Wisdom: supposedly 'Cheaters Never Prosper.' Please. We all know that's a bunch of crap. The saying should state that 'Cheaters Always Prosper...Until Someone Knocks Them on Their Asses.' Let that someone be you; take a stand against plagiarism. When you see the kid beside you sneaking a look at his textbook during the exam, give it a kick on your way to the bathroom. He won't be able to retrieve it without giving the game away. That girl waiting to photocopy her friend's history paper ten minutes before the deadline? Jam the photocopier when it's your turn.
All right, all right, these are all malicious and destructive responses to plagiarism. But hey, a little fantasizing never hurt anyone, right? The MOST EFFECTIVE way of stopping is plagiarism happens to be my personal favorite: Turn to the Evil Person and say, calmly to his/her face "I'm sorry you're too busy to write this paper/lab report/whatever. Perhaps you should take fewer classes next semester, or talk to your parents about transferring to a less academically rigorous school."
The expression on his or her face will, undoubtedly, make your day.
It sure made mine.
Mwahahahaha...no.
WolfGrrl
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